Cancer changes everything. But it doesn’t take away our faith or hope.
On 12/28/20, my husband, Nathan, was in a head on collision and suffered a concussion, whiplash, nerve damage in his neck and spine, and a torn rotator cuff. A few days later he began having trouble swallowing, which the dr attributed to the nerve damage in his neck. After months of waiting for approval from worker’s comp for every little thing, in April it was discovered he has stage 2 esophageal cancer. That was followed by a frenzy of tests, dr appointments, a stent put through the tumor so he could swallow, a feeding tube, and a chemo port put in. Although it was stressful and we both reacted emotionally to the news, the possibility of him not beating this, and the thought that 21 years together may be all we get…we cried together, we hugged, we told each other how much we love one another, and after the shock, and the emotions settled down, we got down to the business of life and death. We made a will, medical power of attorney, and discussed all the matters of living, dying, and what he wants for me, and how I would continue living without him if the worst happens.
Cancer changes everything. But it doesn’t take away our faith or hope.
After all that, Nathan was scheduled for radiation modeling & chemo education so he could begin treatment. And that’s when we found out he couldn’t start treatment because his insurance company dropped him and he lost his job. The company he worked for did not say a word to him! I began scrambling to find out what we could do next and applied for social security, Medicare and Medicaid. In the meantime, the bills are pouring in, to the tune of over $15k for one month! Plus, the formula Nathan uses in the feeding tube is almost $700 a month, and the place where he would live during treatment is $600 a month. Needless to say, it’s been tremendously stressful and overwhelming.
But during all of this, I believed God was in control. I knew in my heart everything will be all right. No matter how things look, we have to keep our faith focused on Jesus. He is our portion, our healer, and our deliverer. I know that no matter how things go or if they end in a way we aren’t praying for, God has a plan and a purpose. I am grateful for the 21 years Nathan and I have had together, for the family we raised, the adventures we’ve shared, and the love that has grown with us.
Cancer changes everything. But it doesn’t take away our faith or hope.
Thankfulness is often hard to hold onto in times of distress. Faith can be hard to find in the face of overwhelming darkness, but it is these two things that are essential to carrying us through to the other side.
Last Friday, I called Medicaid and after quite some time on the phone, they gave me a number for Nathan. The weight that lifted felt incredible! My first call was to the chemo center so they can get his treatment scheduled, and then to the company that provides Nathan’s formula and supplies, and then to all the hospitals, clinics, labs, & dr offices we owe money to. And, for the cherry on top, the Carondolet House where Nathan will live during treatment has waived their fee!
Cancer changes everything. But it doesn’t take away our faith or hope.
God hears the prayers of His children. And He answers. So, no matter what you are going through right now, God is waiting to hear from you. No matter who you are, or what you’ve done, God is calling you into a relationship with Him through Jesus Christ. I’m not saying life will suddenly be easy or that nothing upsetting will ever happen. What I am saying is that Christ will give you the strength to endure, the faith to believe He is in control, and the grace and mercy to not only survive, but to thrive in the face of darkness.
Cancer changes everything. But it doesn’t take away our faith or hope.
What we need now are some giving hearts to help us continue to fight this fight. We need money for our basic needs, housing, utilities, food, gas, etc. Nathan will not be able to work for at least another year, and since his company sold him out, that means searching for another job. He is such a good man, good father, and a wonderful husband. We just bought our home two years ago with the plan that he would work another 5 years and retire. We would live out the rest of our lives here, spending summers taking grandkids to the river to fish and swim. That has changed.
Cancer changes everything. But it doesn’t take away our faith or hope.