Hello, my name is Zane Shook. We had a great life, until our son and Special Needs Warrior, Wyatt Zane, passed in my arms. Much of me died this day, I threw up all of my stomach acid and made sounds and screams no other man (Officer Nate) should ever have to hear. We moved as we could not live there any longer, too painful. I have not worked full time since, I have PTSD, originally from getting shot with a shotgun three days before Sweet Sixteen. it went unquantifiable after Wyatt passed (I still can’t say the D word) They also diagnosed me with Complicated Grief Disorder. I also have Psoriatic Arthritis, Hashimoto’s Thyroid Disease. I am taking my meds as I should. My shotgun Clavicle grew back, I broke it working on Wyatt the day he passed. I hurt it again trying to move limbs and one fell right on the Titanium rod holding my bone together. DRS at this point said to apply for SSDI, they denied right away and wanted the Sleep study and CT scan w/contrast my DR ordered but in all their wisdom, Insurance denied this.
This is not easy for me to ask for help. I used to work sunup to sundown doing Carpet cleaning, repair, dying, repairs, restoration. I know I’ll never be that guy again.
I have written since I was a kid. Poems, Stories. I have a lot of requests to write my life, but I think I want to step way outside of my comfort zone and read my work aloud, via Tik Tok/Youtube etc.
One thing is sure, you are a different person after losing a child. My wife, Julie, took out a loan, high interest we knew, but this is crazy. We have paid on this loan for three years and still owe over half. The interest alone is $25.00 a day. I will not say the name of the company, but their commercials are everywhere.
My biggest issue now is, about two years after losing Wyatt, I lost all of my teeth due to some bacterial infection the Dentist could not identify. I did try some fancy dentures, but they keep breaking and are very bulky. If all my issues aren’t enough, my esophagus is rifled, looks like a piece of licorice. Have to have it stretched every year, so I do not choke.
I need a denture that will not engage my overactive gag reflex.
If I can build my channel, my ultimate dream is to get Permanent Dentures but that is $50,000. Big dream I know but aren’t they supposed to be.
I am pretty much a recluse these days due to my teeth. Self-conscious is an understatement. I do still take Wyatt places, KC Royals games. In 2019. we rolled in and rocked out with Metallica in KC at The Sprint Center.
To help you better understand who you are helping, I am including a video.
Life of Dad asked me to do a Mini Doc for their channels Real Dad Series. I may share that video but wanted to share the full original reading of it so you can better come to know us.
I’ll include my only untitled poem. I wrote for my Cuddle Bug.
The format will be off a bit.
Thank you for your time. Much love from The Land of OZ
It’s not how we take some down but how we help others up
not how we gloat in victory but how we learn from defeat
as we mourn our precious loss, we also celebrate their life
if i am to be judged on my ferocity or reckless abandon
let it be not in my battles but in the way i loved.